Oh You Who Were My Friend

Lovers have a right to betray you... friends don't. ~ Judy Holliday

Have you ever wondered when to call it quits with a friend? When what they have become no longer looks like your friend? However, does that make you a bad friend or a smart individual for leaving. It's rather a dilemma.

If Hitler had one good friend who stuck by him, would he have ever tried to commit genocide or kill millions? Because having one good friend is such a powerful thing. It can make or break someone, and turn them into something all so very new.

The thing about friendship is that you only know your true friends when things start hitting the fan, in wet and sloppy amounts. Otherwise, you can never really tell who will stand by you and who will not. That is the definition of a good friend: one who sticks by you, through thick or thin and hell and back.

On the other hand, what happens if your friend is a crazy monster? Does that release you of the bonds of good friendship? Furthermore, it might not be your place to save your once friend. As a friend your position is quite limited as you are an equal. Furthermore, you can only save those who want to be saved.

To sums things up would be to really say, how much do you want to sacrifice? Be realistic, will you be more harm by being around. Sometimes you just need to give space to people. Other times you may very well be called on to slap some sense into your friend. Followed by grabbing them and dragging them out of their own personal hell.

Knowing can be quite hard. More so since, the road to hell is pave with good intentions. However, the question you need to really ask yourself before leaving, or staying is this: Is this a phase or is them really all along?

A Place In This World

People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf. ~ George Orwell

 

People in general despise violent people. Not out of experience or sense of right, but because of principle and teaching. However, there is nothing wrong with violence in a sense. For it can be used either way. Just like fire can keep us safe and warm, and in another situation grills you. So with the same way with violence.

Violence is generally associated with something horrible. In some ways rightly so. However, violence is sometimes needed. For there is a time for everything. A time to talk and time to fight. Some situations call upon for talk and others if nothing is done, evil triumphs because good men did nothing. 

Furthermore, violence is needed to be used by the good guys to fight the bad guys. If Saint George talked to the dragon he would be dead, if people talked to Hitler he would have taken over the world, and if people keep trying to talk things out in certain situations, we'll all be dead or in chains. The thing is that violence is needed, for there is a time when all options are exhausted. 

Most people fear violence because it's scary and because what they have been taught. Being taught that we should love everyone does not make sense to those who see violence. So when they see it they condemn and they fear it.The problem with that is that people will condemn whether it be right or wrong. And they do it out of fear,and self-righteousness.

With people condemning violence blindly, it is wrong on so many levels. Firstly, would be because it's hypocritical in three ways: People enjoy the safety and benefits of violence yet condemn it, people talk about acceptance yet shun the very ones who protect them from great evil, and lastly, when it suits people needs they honor them only when they're dead. All the while spouting about accepting people for who they are. However, what they don't understand is that the world is a violent place. The very fact is that even in peace time we need people to patrol streets to stop violence.

In addition, contrary to popular belief, violent people aren't evil or wrong.They have a place in this world and they will always be needed. Furthermore, violence without a cause is wrong. But if you can hone it so it does good, it can do wonders. Howbeit, if people are so afraid of violence they won't use it correctly because they just believe it is all bad. They'll just condemn whatever the case. This is a problem, for if people are so fearful of violence, they will alienate the very people who will save us in great danger.

Ultimately, violence is a sad necessary, there are a lot of bad people who only understand that language. Discomforting, but that is all they understand. It's not the best language, but until you can teach them a different language you will need to communicate to them. And that is were you will need violent people.

These Coals Do Burn

Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much. ~ Oscar Wilde

Do you know what can be more rewarding than punching a jerk? Fixing a jerk. It's interesting to see what makes people tick and how they ended up. It may seem sappy, but to see actually someone's countenance change is pretty nice. To see dead eyes become alive once again. It's interesting or saddening, that people only need a little shove in the right direction, to change an enemy to a friend

Arguably, everyone has a sob story. Whether it be true or not matters little. Tragedies strikes everyone.Whatever the case, everyone is damaged in some ways. For nothing is perfect, we all still grow up with pain and or anger. Furthermore, even if one is "normal" one still goes through the wringer. And although you may seem fine because your normal, that would not be so.

For let's say normal is everyone walking around with one arm, and not normal is walking around with no arms. While having one arm than no arm is better. What would be better would be having two arms.

That being so, would be the case of the population. In a sense, we are all damaged goods. Naturally, some are just more damaged then others, to the point it is very obvious. However, it's not all like that, it's like cups some are definitely broken others just have chips off them.

Despite that, it really makes one wonder though;there are no bad guys. No super, evil, great, villain. Only broken people.It's not true that people have arch enemies. Yes, people may be after you and may try and hurt you. But usually, it means that they have gone through life and they've only known a certain way to treat people.

It does not excuse their disgusting behavior or should it stop you from taking appropriate action. However, what it does, is gives you compassion which can be the thing that stops a useless fight. A little bit of mercy that one would not give usually. It's not much, but it can help.

Furthermore, while it takes two hands to clap, it makes a whole room of idiots trying to clap with high fives. And the thing is that spending one's life fighting is not rewarding. It's better to be friends with everyone, than being at war with the rest of the world. No one is out to get you unless you let them chase you. And, if you don't be the grown up in the room, you will only be as mature as the person screaming at you.

Finally, life is best when you can see the whole donut, and not just the little hole. When you can see everything, why people are like that and why you are like that, it makes more sense. It's not that one will be less pissed with people, or will it make you do less stupid things. But what it will do is that you see the a little bit more. And with that view you can realize that things sure look different. You may not only see your story properly, but theirs too.

Who Murdered Kindness?

The best portion of a man's life, his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love. ~ William Wordsworth

Kindness is rarely rewarded in this day an age. It seems to be growing extinct. While many feel that is horrible, it is true. In attempt to rail against it, people have tried to stem the tide with few and futile means. Sometimes it works, most of the time it works for half an hour or a day. Whatever the case, it dies and for a want for better words remains ineffectual at best. With that lies our dilemma to growing problems in society. 

There was this case a few years ago back, about a loving father and husband who died. It was a real tragedy, and not just the fact that he was all that, but how he died and why he died.

Being a good Samaritan this good man saw a man and women violently arguing. Seeing this and trying to help he tried to peacefully solve this conflict. However, at his attempt to help, the couple instead turned against him, and killed him.

In that one moment and a man died who only was trying to do what was right. Kindness died in sense that day for that town. And the sad thing these stories are not separate incidents. While other cases may not be as tragic or violent. They are equally shocking. With cases of people faking breakdown to rob others who try to help, a friendly wave greeted with death, and finally a simple attempt to open a door for another human being met with a curse.

In a sense, a kind act now comes with a price, not at the person receiving it but those that give it. People wonder all the time why are people so evil or just plain rude. This would be one of the reasons. If a good deed is always paid in full hate; It makes a world void of kindness.

Something is desperately wrong, and what we're doing needs to change. It would seem slowly over the last decades society is missing the mark. While people claim to have so many advances in society and the best interest of humanity. It means little or nothing, for society that seems to be steadily growing less caring.

Sure there are nice stories or heart warming tales, but isn't it so sad that they are so rare that the news would report it when they happen? In days of old people were just nicer. Yes, there was still the terrible, but people were nicer.

Nevertheless, with this we all know it. It stares across our faces whether it be at work or play. We already know it. While it may sound grim it's not all bad. For forewarned is forearmed. While living in ignorance is bliss, it last only so long. Knowing is better, but also worse. However, better to face something head on than head in the ground.

So what can you do? Well, it was once said, be sharp as serpents and innocents as doves. The world is dangerous place, it always has been. However, it's just gotten a little worse, so that one must be wise, think before you act, be realistic, and whatever you do be honest about it. And that's what you should do before you do kindness. Sad? No, just a reality.

All in all, this shouldn't stop people, but it's just a reality you must face. It's a very real reality that we are seeing on a wholesale scale an extinction event of kindness. It shouldn't stop you from reaching out and trying to help another fellow being. But it's just something one should be careful about. It's just something that is evolving in society.

However, does that mean we should ever stop being kind or being loving? No, not in a thousand years. Even if it means that being kind could endanger one's self. For if we don't have love, all we are is a bunch of clanging cymbals.

Different Sides

You have so many layers, that you can peel away a few, and everyone's so shocked or impressed that you're baring your soul, while to you it's nothing, because you know you've twenty more layers to go. ~ Craig Thompson, Carnet de Voyage

When you love a person you should love all of them. Whether you be: Romantically involved, family involved, friend involved, or frenemy involved. However, you can probably scratch the last one off. Nevertheless, you should love all of them. But what is all of them? Frankly, it can be difficult to know where someone begins and where the add-ons end.

With people, loving them and not they're faults or the parts that they put up for people is quite tricky. It's probably best explained like this.The person you love is fleshy, pink, human and all. However, whether they put on or change different clothes would be like their faults or good things about them. Loving a fault or good thing they do would be like loving a tee-shirt and not the human.

In a way that's good, because while faults aren't as easy as changing a sock, they can be stripped away to find the real person that you loved all along.

Sometimes the person you love will get holes or rents in they're clothes. Or in this case, they're traits that they stop doing. It may seem to change them, but the real person is still there because it's just holes in their clothes or how they act and the things that they do.

In addition, a person you love may get scars or gray hair of wisdom.These are part of them truly. Not like clothes that are traits that you can pop off and on. These can be caused by events that shake them or change 'em so much so that it comes part of them. It's still them, but a bit different because what they have been through.

With loving someone, it's important to really love them for who they are and not what they do. Sure you can love the things that they do that come from being them. However, if you love only that, what happens if they stop doing that? Or it can also apply to someone having a bad trait, they have the trait that drives you crazy. That's just a sock, it can be taken off and there's the person you love so dearly.

So whatever the case, the things people do that you love or hate, is in a way just like a fruit of where they are right now in they're life. It's not always pretty but as that person that you truly loves changes love them for all they are. Just like a tree, you water it, prune it when it needs it, and finally enjoy the different aspects of it through every season and weather. 

The Good, The Bad, and the Ones With Bags On They're Heads

When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother. ~ Rodney Dangerfield

In a world where people are obsessed with their looks it makes one wonder why? The simple reason is because of self-image. Alongside Tv and magazines which help the madness of the search for contemporary good looks. While it might seem a simple thing or silly that people should worry about they're looks, it's quite serious. 

The reason so is, that it's a fundamental thing that is being attacked. It's how you look and who you are. Yes, you can change your looks, but you can't really fully change yourself. If any real change, or lasting change is to happen, it must be done by an inward change not an outward one. And with this forcing of how you should look, it's forcing people basically to realize that they aren't good enough. And so thus are worthless if they don't look like worth.

Although in different circles, people are realizing that happiness triumphs over looks, most people just don't seem to appreciate a sexy “wobble”.

 In addition, most of the population is not really ugly. Naturally, there are some general cases of people being actually ugly. But most of the time it's due to, not dressing correctly, acting appropriately, or just not slapping enough paint on they're face. Howbeit, people don't take that in to account, which makes them think they're ugly.

The problem with the thinking that one is ugly is that beauty and good looks change over time. What was counted as attractive a few years back is no longer now. So what that means is that beauty is changing. You might be ugly today and beautiful tomorrow. It's all very flighty.

While beauty is a complicated thing and confusing, it's not really much to worry. For people don't mind ugly because at the end of the day, people fall in love with humans not photo-shop, in general. Furthermore, sometimes people can find beauty intimidating. Also, when your good looking you have more opportunity to be harassed.

With that all in mind, being ugly is technically just a mindset rather than anything. Beauty in the beholder whole thing. What is ugly to someone is beauty to another. And with the world being so weird, someone is bound to think your handsome or beautiful. All you need to worry is that you can be ready for that person when the time comes. Or in the mean time you can enjoy knowing that someone believes that. 

For if someone believe something, at least ten thousand others believe so. So thus your not ugly, to ten thousand people. Maybe to the rest of humanity, but not to that many people. So thus what would be called ugly is now good looking. So now you can walk head high and eat that little more fries.

Though Kings And Queens Fall

You don't have a peaceful revolution. You don't have a turn-the-cheek revolution. There's no such thing as a nonviolent revolution. ~ Malcolm X

Every revolution that has been or that will be will always have bloodshed. It's understandable. However, what is not understandable is the amount of bloodshed that is shed. It's not just a little amount, but large amounts, and unnecessary amounts. Sometimes so much blood is shed that more could have been saved had there never been a revolution. So thus defeating the purpose of having the revolution.

In history, there has only been one really successful revolution. And that would have to be the American Revolution. However, mind you, the American Revolution can't really be counted as a revolution. It was more of getting rid of an invading force since the Colonials had lived so long in America and had been established in the place so strongly.

Anyhow, most revolutions are fraught with violence. Tremendous amounts. And the scary thing about revolutions in general is that the people who take over have to be scarier, meaner, and more angry than the people they took over to beat them. And there lies why revolutions aren't really worth it. Which brings to mind, better the devil you know, than the one you don't know.

The thing about revolution is that it has been romanticized. It may seem fantastic, but the truth is that besides all the hyped ideology and beliefs, greed and the usual sins of ruling a country are still very much there.

Take the French Revolution, one of the most famous revolutions. It had to be done so many times till it succeed and many times things weren't solved. Furthermore, the times they did win, they had a little cuddly moment called the Reign of Terror.

While certain governments and other ruling powers may be horrible and we should never condone their actions, sometimes it would be better for people to just work with them. Or least work things out with them.

In Egypt they had a revolution, now they are a bit settled, but before in that time of revolution, an extremist Islamic group took over who was worse than the former government. While the news made it seem like a grand revolution it wasn't.

Or take for instance the recent Syrian Civil War. People got all excited that the Syrians were starting to stand up for themselves. But they made a deal with the devil and now ISIS is working with them. The thing about revolutions is that they are flawed and dangerous.

While it may seem that the governments of certain nations are evil which they can be. It should be known they can change. And sometimes their jobs are very tough.

As an illustration, communist China. Although they have done horrible things, they have achieved great things. China was in ruins after the Western worlds came in and fed them opium and then even more so by the Japanese invasion. It's only understandable that something desperate and dangerous would rise from the ashes. 

However,despite all that, the Chinese government are making things better, very slowly. And things aren't all perfect, they have to be very tough. With over more than 200 hundred dialects and 56 ethnic groups in China, it's practically trying to rule the whole of Europe. So it's a bit understandable how they are. Ruling a nation is never easy.

The thing with these struggling, harsh, nations, it's not always simple or fun. Sometimes they have to make grown up decisions. It's tough. We shouldn't accept all they're actions. But the thing is that we, as the Western world, the UN and other people, need to grow up. It's not all honky donky for people. Some of the people they rule are very nasty people. And waving our hands and condemning everything is not very helpful. 

Maybe that worked once, but that is no longer really worth doing now. It's just shouting with no power. Also, it's important to not forget that the so called developed countries of today use to be just like the underdeveloped countries. However they had time to grow up. It won't always be pretty, it's a bit like someone growing up as a teenager. It's pimply and squeaky. 

Yes, governments are flawed and we can get angry at them, but at the end of the day, they are ruled by humans. Humans, just like you and me. With loves and hates. People who sometimes do stupid things. But people who can change, people who are in power, so thus governments can change. It may take time, but things are not all over. They just need time.

Love, Stupid Simple.

Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love. ~ Mother Teresa

Love, the thing that starts wars and causes many things. Its really stupid, but quite arguably the best thing. The very stuff that makes men do deeds deserving of poets to scream for the eons to come, for women to swoon at, and children to wonder about the very greatness of it. Love, it will never change, its probably one of the few absolutes in this life. And the very thing that hits the spot every time.

In a world where free love is supposed to be common and true. You'll find that there is little or no truth in it. Rather what love that was here is fleeing out the door so to speak. With so little love in the world you wonder why is there so little when love is supposed to fix everything.

The sad truth is that love in a way is dying. With broken families it's not much of a surprise that society has become what it has become. For as children, we learn so much. If anything, that is the time where we are supposed to be infused with love so that we can grow up to be healthy beings and not stunted children.

In a research with two orphanages in Mexico and America, it was found that the Mexican babies were healthier and happier than the American children. Even though the American orphanage had superior funding and training. 

The key factor that made the Mexican orphanage better was because the Mexicans would pick up the babies hug them and show them true affection. While the American orphanage was proper and sterile.

With that in mind, love is a commodity that is needed from death till birth. Every song on the radio is about it, every book about it, and every movie too. Humans need it like a drug. If it is in such demand it can only mean that it is a rare thing. Rare, but not that rare. However, still rarer enough so there is a shortage.

Love could change the world. Howbeit, so could nuclear weapons and money, but neither of these things are something that will be used. All for different but similar reasons. The similarities would be fear, selfishness, and lack of purpose. Either way, both are not changing the world, just yet.

Love is so vital and important to us but we barely seem to realize it. It's like people are wondering around with a missing arm. If society could be infused love back into every aspect of our lives the world would be better. However, that is not going to happen over night. 

It has to be generated, by humans beings in general and some animals, but really it's humans that create love.

So can you change the world with love? Yes, but whether you can love enough to conquer is unlikely. It has to be a combined effort that would have to be very large. 

But in the mean time, it's important to remember, to live without love would be to contemplate a world without life or very void of all meaning. For love is the very thing that holds this world full of any good.