Who Do You Love

When you love someone . . . ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

What happens when someone loves you for what you are, and not who you are? Is that alright? If someone loved their wife with their whole heart, but not for who their wife was, is that okay? Is it right that people love you for what role you play in their life? Is there a distinction?

Do you love your mother or do you love the person who is your mother? A mother is someone who cares for their child, raises them, feeds them, that is what they are supposed to do. If any mother did that for you, would you not love them, irrespectively that they weren't your actual mother? However, did you love them only for that aspect, that role that she played in your life, and not for the woman who likes classical music, enjoys polka or strawberries?

 

Loving someone for who they are is probably impossible. However, it's possible, but rare. You love your friends and you hate your enemies, but what happens when your friends turn into your enemies and your enemies turn into your friends. Most likely you would love your friends and still hate your enemies. Despite them switching, you love the people who have those roles in your life. You don't love them for being them, but rather their role.

If your best friend is John, but he suddenly started slapping you in the face, you wouldn't love him anymore, because that's not what friends do. Those are his actions, and he is taking more of a role of an enemy. Through it all, John is still John, but now you don't like him, because he isn't acting like a friend but an enemy. He is still everything that he was when he was your friend, as he will be as your enemy. Nevertheless, it's only obvious you don't love him, but you love him only as your friend. You won't love him when he is your enemy but only when he is your friend.

You can admire certain traits in your enemy, and you can see the exact traits that are in the people you love, but is it not so that your enemy is not your friend, so thus roles divide us?

The truth of the matter is, love is love, just like bullets are bullets, it doesn't matter what you are, if they hit you, you will be affected. So in the same manner, if someone loves you, who are you to judge why they love you. However, if they love you for what you are, what happens when you are no longer that, does that not make you a slave of love? If you step out of those conditions, the love will stop. If you stop being that, but keep on being you, love ends.